Happiness is knowing that you’re loved, even from across the ocean.
Whilst it is inevitable, as a military wife, at some point you will face the heart wrenching prospect of your husband being deployed to a dangerous faraway land, where you are left to hold the fort, look after your family, and try, somehow to keep yourself together.
THE FIRST NIGHT
The very first night he leaves, you’re probably going to find yourself feeling a little numb and emotionally bamboozled. This is similar to how, in a car accident, at first your brain doesn’t register the pain so that the body can cope – then, in creeps the sadness and sense of loss that can consume you to the point of crying yourself to sleep. The first night is going to be tough, no matter what, so give yourself a break and allow yourself to feel your feelings, take care of yourself and if necessary find a distraction to keep your mind busy.
CONNECT THROUGH A PHYSICAL GIFT
A lot of military couples will exchange small gifts as a symbolic reminder of the connection you share. MilitaryCoinsUsa offer a relevant light, simple token gesture that is easy for your husband to take with him on deployment.
CREATE A CARE PACKAGE
Providing your husband with a care package is a great way to keep him reminded of the love and care you have for him. Equally, you could encourage an exchange of care packages so that you have something to tend to your lonely heart when you’re missing him. A particularly nice idea are “open if…” notes, as an example “open if you need a hug” or “open if you miss home.” Then, in each note you can put a little treat that will bring him comfort.
WORK ON YOURSELF
Whilst it is tempting and understandable to feel alone, worried and uncertain throughout a deployment, this can be a great time to have the space to connect with yourself and work on your own personal goals. This can be a great opportunity for self-reflection, self-growth and self-improvement.
There’s a saying that “energy flows where attention goes” and if your focus is on how sad and lonely you feel, then time is going to drag a lot slower than if you are out and about keeping yourself busy. Find a hobby, connect with friends, exercise, go to work, go the gym and set some goals to achieve for yourself whilst he’s away.
Write to each other, speak when you can, and keep the love alive by focusing on the good times you’ve shared and the experiences you’re yet to have together. If you’re celebrating an anniversary whilst he’s away, that can be tough – so be sure to exchange gifts and letters before he is deployed.
EMBRACE SUPPORTIVE FRIENDS
You may, at times, feel too sad to be sociable but it’s important you don’t cut yourself off and that you surround yourself with supportive friends. What can be particularly helpful is connecting with other military wives that are going through the same thing as you, as the sense of support, understanding and sisterhood can be very comforting.
Main photo cred – Weheartit